Four Hundred and Four

Dear Callumz,

We've had a nice day today. We've talked about a fair bit- a fair range of genres of conversation!

Sometimes I worry about you though. You have a pretty tough situation. It means a lot to me for you to be happy, and I know that sometimes, that hinders it, no matter how much I wish it couldn't.

I can't blame you at all for wanting it all to just go away, and obviously I wish it would too. But I also want you to know that to me, you're still just Callum. However much we wish it wasn't, it is, for now at least. Even though it's something you struggle with, and we both may in the future, I want you to know that I want to help you. Even if worst comes to worst, you're still my boyfriend and I love you, no matter what. Your circumstances haven't changed that now; and they never will, because you're Callum, and you're different to everyone else.

You asked me this afternoon what makes you so different. I cut the list short, but I would actually like to complete it...

• You actually give a damn about what's happening in my life. When you ask, it's not because it's just polite or expected- you're interested. 
• You listen to what I have to say.
• You always know the right words to use to calm me down or console me after a bad day.
• You tease me nicely. There aren't a whole bunch of people around who understand when enough is enough, or how to pick gently on someone without making them turn out the way I did every other time it happened...
• You're handsome- it's completely undeniable...
• You take the time and make the effort to write back to me...
• You've never stood me up or broken my heart...
• You've never left me to cry alone for days on end...
• You treat me with actual real respect...
• You think I'm beautiful and you actually take the time to tell me that when no one else does...
• You're actually in a long distance relationship with me- I've never met anyone else who'd do that...
• You're intelligent, and so is our conversation...
• You can make me want to be with you really badly...
• You're honest, even when it hurts- I'd rather brutal honesty than sweet nothings...
• You've never given up on me or judged me, even when I've given you every reason to...
• You've never used the vocabulary on me that so many other people have- words I refuse to publish on here...
• You encourage me to do the things I love, even when I doubt myself...
• You helped to heal a broken heart- and for that, I will be forever indebted and grateful to you...

Love always,
Kaiteh.